In Which I Try to Find Deeper Meaning

I don’t consider myself an intuitive person. I don’t get things straight off the bat, or come up with brilliant analogies for explaining difficult concepts. Our Orthopaedic consultant is really good at that – he managed to explain the complex immune process of opsonization (where bacteria get coated with special substances so that the body can destroy it) by comparing it to icing on cake (everyone wants a slice). 

But in a recent post on The Art in Life, Hannah noticed that she wasn’t talking about anything transcendental or abstracting about life and I had a moment of “So that’s what blogging is supposed to be like? Abstraction and transcendentalism are so not my thing. ”

Which, of course, isn’t true. At least, not entirely. There are whole blogs devoted to Birkin bags and sleeping in airports. Blogging is about anything you want it to be about. And today I want it to be about Fruit Ninja. And abstraction.

I am so serious and grown up right now.

You know the multiplayer option in Fruit Ninja? Both players get the same fruits to attack and the same basic bombs to avoid, only you can also launch bombs at each other from across the screen. I was playing with K, at first without realizing that he was actually throwing extra bombs my way, and when I caught on I started to retaliate in kind.

But then the games got shorter.

When we were playing without attempting to explode each other’s screen, we continued battling fruit and sidestepping minefields for several minutes. As soon as we started throwing things at each other, things got trickier and we tended to lose more quickly.

Which reminds me of relationships.

When you work together to tackle the obstacles (and dodge the catastrophes) that affect both of you, both of you last longer. And as soon as it becomes ‘every man for himself’, the playing field loses its footing and someone explodes gets hurt.

Morale of the story? Don’t throw bombs at people – it ends badly for everyone involved.

Also, never bet against your boyfriend on video games.

Don’t hate the player, hate the game.

Bird brained. Because I’m funny, you guys.

The last time I went to the health centre, I was distracted from reading a years-old issue of Vogue by a tiny bird who was really going at it with the tinted glass doors.

He would fly away a little distance then dive-bomb the glass before bouncing off to land on the handle. He kept at it for five minutes at a time, fluttering his wings pompously and tapping at the glass with his beak in desperation. Then he’d flay away and come back to do it all again.

I was starting to wonder if he was trying to get inside (birds need medical attention too) or if he was trying to get me to come outside so he could tell me he got turned into a bird by an evil magician and could I please help him to break the spell. This makes sense because my name is Robyn so of course I have an affinity for the avian species. Who else would the man-trapped-in-a-bird’s-body be trying to contact, some chick named Jane? Please.

But then I asked the receptionist about it, and she was all “Oh, it’s a seasonal thing. I think they like to play with their reflections, or they just like how the handle feels. They’re destroying the tint, though.”

Whatever.

I like my version better.

open letter to people with umbrellas (you know who you are)

Dear people with umbrellas,

Why is it that when it is raining, is always the people with umbrellas that feel they must walk under every awning on the street? The whole point of the umbrella is that you don’t need to cotch under the chiney man shop door like everybody else who don’t have umbrella. All you doing is getting everybody under there wet with the water dripping off your shelter on a stick, and endangering the eyes of everybody you pass.

All I ask is that you walk as close to the street as possible without making the drivers honk at you for scratching up their cars with your umbrellas. And leave the shelter to the cold and wet among us who couldn’t fork out the $250 to buy an umbrella from the umbrella man who selling them down the road.

Sincerely,
Cold and wet pedestrian

See, he knows what I’m talking about.

Time wasting, like sleep cycles, probably wasted on the studious

Don’t fall asleep.

If I could offer you on piece of advice on relieving boredom in an examination, not falling asleep would be it. The benefits of not falling asleep have been discussed by many students, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis other than my own meandering experience.
Sincerest apologies to Mary Scmich.
Hum your favourite song.
Rock back and forth, casting darting, suspicious glances at everyone who looks your way.
Try to use telekinesis to make the clock move faster.
Watch people.
Draw something.
Erase it.
Draw something else.
Spend time planning ridiculous blog entries like this one.
Sketch a cartoon.
Play doll house with your pens and pencils.
Write a story.
Count the number of tiles in the ceiling.
Leave funny notes on your exam paper for the invigilators to laugh at.
Measure your pulse rate.

And lastly, check your answers over exactly one minute before the end of the exam. This never fails to induce a last minute panic that you can do almost nothing about.

Pax.

Why am I like this?

I got my yellow highlighter y’all! Now I just need a sketchpad for my mind maps and I’ll be all set!

A sketchpad. I am insane.

Mortal Kombat: Facebook vs. Last’s Anatomy

Shameless use of MK is shameless

FIGHT!

Last’s Anatomy uses: relations of the inferior vena cava
Facebook blocks
Facebook uses: funny pictures
Last’s Anatomy suffers damage

Last’s Anatomy uses: attachments of psoas major…
Facebook suffers minor damage

Facebook uses: interesting links to Cracked.com
Last’s Anatomy suffers damage

Facebook uses: conversations with random people
Facebook uses: notifications

FINISH HIM

Facebook uses: combo: update profile picture, update status, check news feed

BRUTALITY

Facebook wins.

The at home med student: procrastinating must end

This picture is motivating the hell out of me right now.

I’ve fallen into this habit of putting things off just because I don’t have the right resources. I procrastinate like it’s a career, so adding a new reason for my laziness is like a diabetic demanding extra icing on her cake. Some things can actually be discouraging, like not having a proper desk or study area, and anyone who’s ever tried to study on their bed can tell you that that’s 70% of study motivation right there.

But it’s gotten so ridiculous that I won’t start studying because I don’t have a yellow highlighter. A yellow highlighter. Because I won’t be able to colour-code my notes. A yellow highlighter. Maybe it’s the denouement of a slippery slope of ridiculous procrastination, but it was a wake up call to stop wasting time.

It’s just a highlighter, for goodness’ sake.


Do you procrastinate? What silly reasons do you give yourself for not starting something on time?